Please note that I am on vacation on the East Coast from June 2 until June 10 inclusive. I will not be booking sessions during that time. I may or may not be responding to queries, depending on whether or not internet access exists where I am going.
If you would like to book something for June 11 onward, please send Me a note. Just know that My response time will not be as quick as usual!
Have a spankingly good first week of June...!
Tuesday, June 1, 2010
Friday, May 21, 2010
Kinky Quote of the Day: The Good of BDSM
"BDSM gives you a better sense of perspective – about power, about sensation, about the limits of the body. We learn the difference between power and force.
BDSM allows us to access the dark side of our personalities, validates that the more aggressive, confrontational, unsocialized, kinky side has a place as important as any other aspect of our selves – so it doesn’t leak out in unconscious, unhealthy, unproductive ways.
BDSM teaches us better negotiation and communication skills. It allows us to learn our limits and boundaries. BDSM teaches us about trust. It teaches us how to articulate and pursue our desires.
BDSM allows us to give up or stop that constant inner monologue, that self-monitoring, and gives us a “vacation” from the self. It allows us to set aside certain parts of the self and develop other parts.
BDSM is fun. It feels good. That is an end, a good, in itself and doesn’t need any further justification."
-Dr. Richard A. Sprott is a developmental psychologist and active in the leather community of the San Francisco Bay Area.
BDSM allows us to access the dark side of our personalities, validates that the more aggressive, confrontational, unsocialized, kinky side has a place as important as any other aspect of our selves – so it doesn’t leak out in unconscious, unhealthy, unproductive ways.
BDSM teaches us better negotiation and communication skills. It allows us to learn our limits and boundaries. BDSM teaches us about trust. It teaches us how to articulate and pursue our desires.
BDSM allows us to give up or stop that constant inner monologue, that self-monitoring, and gives us a “vacation” from the self. It allows us to set aside certain parts of the self and develop other parts.
BDSM is fun. It feels good. That is an end, a good, in itself and doesn’t need any further justification."
-Dr. Richard A. Sprott is a developmental psychologist and active in the leather community of the San Francisco Bay Area.
Saturday, May 15, 2010
Eastern Canada is calling...
It just so happens that I will be visiting PEI from June 3-June 10. If there is interest, I may be able to fit some sessions in on the 5, 6, 7, or 8th of June.
Interest must be communicated to Me before June 1 so that the logistics can be arranged.
See you soon!
Interest must be communicated to Me before June 1 so that the logistics can be arranged.
See you soon!
Friday, April 30, 2010
Monday, April 19, 2010
Kinky Thought of the Day
"BDSM is spinning a sexual yarn blending threads of fact and fantasy, drama and comedy, tradition and innovation."
- excerpt from the book Screw the Roses, Send Me the Thorns by P. Miller and M. Devon
- excerpt from the book Screw the Roses, Send Me the Thorns by P. Miller and M. Devon
Friday, April 9, 2010
The 9 Levels of Submission
Several entries ago I did a piece on sensual BDSM that really resonated with many of you. While surfing the web today I found the following, which expands on the variety of categories of "submissives" that exist, and may help you to ascertain your own predilections and desires with more accuracy.
From my personal perspective as a domme, none of these is better or any more "ideal" as a client than any other - but knowing what your stance is can help in your communication of your desires to Me and will ensure a more satisfying session for both of us:
"Within the S/M subculture, different people use the words "submissive and slave" to mean many different things. When submissives say "I want to be your slave," sometimes they mean only that they want to be tied up and whipped. Many professional dominants routinely refer to their (usually _not_ very genuinely submissive clients) as "slaves." At the other extreme, there are people who want to be full-time personal servants, and who truly want to exist solely for their Dom(me)'s use, pleasure and convenience. And there are many shades in between these two extremes.
1. THE OUTRIGHT NON-SUBMISSIVE MASOCHIST or KINKY SENSUALIST. Not into servitude, humiliation or giving up control; just pain and/or spiced-up sensuality, on the masochist's own terms and for the masochist's own direct pleasure (i.e. turned on solely/mainly by one's own bodily sensatons rather than by being "used" to gratify one's partner's sadism).
2. PSEUDO-SUBMISSIVE NON-SLAVE. Not into even playing "slave," but into other "submissive" role-playing, e.g. schoolteacher scenes, infantilism, "forced" transvestism. Usually into humiliation, but NOT into servitude, even in play. Dictates the scene to a large degree.
3. PSEUDO-SUBMISSIVE PLAY SLAVE. Likes to play at being a slave; likes to feel subservient; may in some cases like to feel one is being "used" to gratify partner's sadism; may even really serve the dominant in some ways, but only on the "slave's" own terms. Dictates the scene to a large degree; often fetishistic (e.g. foot worshippers).
4. TRUE SUBMISSIVE NON-SLAVE. Really gives up control (only temporarily and within agreed-upon limits), but gets her/his main satisfaction from aspects of submission other than serving or being used by the dominant. Usually turned on by suspense, vulnerability, and/or giving up responsbility. Doesn't dictate the scene except in very general terms, but still seek mainly her/his own direct/pleasure (rather than getting one's pleasure mainly from pleasing the dominant).
5. TRUE SUBMISSIVE PLAY SLAVE. Really gives up control (though only temporarily; only during brief "scenes" and within limits) and gets main satisfaction from serving/being used by dominant-but only for FUN purposes, usually erotic. May/may not be into pain. If so, is turned on by pain indirectly, i.e. enjoys being the object of one's partner's sadism, on which the submissive places very few requirements or restrictions.
6. UNCOMMITTED SHORT-TERM BUT MORE THAN PLAY SEMI-SLAVE. Really gives up control (usually within limits); wants to serve and be used by the dominant; wants to provide practical/non erotic as well as fun/erotic services; but only when the "slave" is in the mood. May even act as a full-time slave for, say, several days at a time, but is free to quit at any time (or at the end of the agreed upon several days). May or may not have long-term relationship with one's Mistress, but, either way, the "slave" has the final say over when she will serve.
7. PART-TIME CONSENSUAL-BUT REAL SLAVE. Has an ongoing commitment to an owner/slave relationship and regards oneself as the dominant's property at all times. Wants to obey and please dom(me) in all aspects of life-practical/non erotic and fun/erotic. Devotes most of time to other commitments (e.g. job) but Dom(me) has first pick of the slave's free time.
8. FULL-TIME LIVE IN CONSENSUAL SLAVE. Within no more than a few broad limits/requirements, the slave regards herself/himself as existing solely for the Dom(me)'s pleasure/well being. Slave in turn expects to be regarded as a prized possession. Not much different from the situation of the traditional housewife, except that within the S/M world the slave's position is more likely to be fully consensual, especially of the slave is male. Within the S/M world, a full time "slave" arrangement is entered into with an explicit awareness of the magnitude carefully, with more awareness of the magnitude of power that is being given up, and hence is usually entered into much more carefully, with more awareness of the possible dangers, and with much clearer and more specific agreements than usually precede the traditional marriage.
9. CONSENSUAL TOTAL SLAVE WITH NO LIMITS. A common fantasy ideal which probably doesn't exist in real life (except in authoritarian religious cults and other situations where the "consent" is induced by brainwashing and/or social or economic pressures, and hence isn't fully consensual). A few S/M purists will insist that you aren't really a slave unless you're willing to do absolutely anything for your Dom(me), with no limits at all. I've met a few people who claimed to be no-limit slaves, but in all cases I have reason to doubt the claim."
***********************************************************************************
I found this piece on http://www.mybdsm.com/. They claim to be uncertain of the author, so if anyone knows who penned this, let me know and I will give credit where it is due.
From my personal perspective as a domme, none of these is better or any more "ideal" as a client than any other - but knowing what your stance is can help in your communication of your desires to Me and will ensure a more satisfying session for both of us:
"Within the S/M subculture, different people use the words "submissive and slave" to mean many different things. When submissives say "I want to be your slave," sometimes they mean only that they want to be tied up and whipped. Many professional dominants routinely refer to their (usually _not_ very genuinely submissive clients) as "slaves." At the other extreme, there are people who want to be full-time personal servants, and who truly want to exist solely for their Dom(me)'s use, pleasure and convenience. And there are many shades in between these two extremes.
1. THE OUTRIGHT NON-SUBMISSIVE MASOCHIST or KINKY SENSUALIST. Not into servitude, humiliation or giving up control; just pain and/or spiced-up sensuality, on the masochist's own terms and for the masochist's own direct pleasure (i.e. turned on solely/mainly by one's own bodily sensatons rather than by being "used" to gratify one's partner's sadism).
2. PSEUDO-SUBMISSIVE NON-SLAVE. Not into even playing "slave," but into other "submissive" role-playing, e.g. schoolteacher scenes, infantilism, "forced" transvestism. Usually into humiliation, but NOT into servitude, even in play. Dictates the scene to a large degree.
3. PSEUDO-SUBMISSIVE PLAY SLAVE. Likes to play at being a slave; likes to feel subservient; may in some cases like to feel one is being "used" to gratify partner's sadism; may even really serve the dominant in some ways, but only on the "slave's" own terms. Dictates the scene to a large degree; often fetishistic (e.g. foot worshippers).
4. TRUE SUBMISSIVE NON-SLAVE. Really gives up control (only temporarily and within agreed-upon limits), but gets her/his main satisfaction from aspects of submission other than serving or being used by the dominant. Usually turned on by suspense, vulnerability, and/or giving up responsbility. Doesn't dictate the scene except in very general terms, but still seek mainly her/his own direct/pleasure (rather than getting one's pleasure mainly from pleasing the dominant).
5. TRUE SUBMISSIVE PLAY SLAVE. Really gives up control (though only temporarily; only during brief "scenes" and within limits) and gets main satisfaction from serving/being used by dominant-but only for FUN purposes, usually erotic. May/may not be into pain. If so, is turned on by pain indirectly, i.e. enjoys being the object of one's partner's sadism, on which the submissive places very few requirements or restrictions.
6. UNCOMMITTED SHORT-TERM BUT MORE THAN PLAY SEMI-SLAVE. Really gives up control (usually within limits); wants to serve and be used by the dominant; wants to provide practical/non erotic as well as fun/erotic services; but only when the "slave" is in the mood. May even act as a full-time slave for, say, several days at a time, but is free to quit at any time (or at the end of the agreed upon several days). May or may not have long-term relationship with one's Mistress, but, either way, the "slave" has the final say over when she will serve.
7. PART-TIME CONSENSUAL-BUT REAL SLAVE. Has an ongoing commitment to an owner/slave relationship and regards oneself as the dominant's property at all times. Wants to obey and please dom(me) in all aspects of life-practical/non erotic and fun/erotic. Devotes most of time to other commitments (e.g. job) but Dom(me) has first pick of the slave's free time.
8. FULL-TIME LIVE IN CONSENSUAL SLAVE. Within no more than a few broad limits/requirements, the slave regards herself/himself as existing solely for the Dom(me)'s pleasure/well being. Slave in turn expects to be regarded as a prized possession. Not much different from the situation of the traditional housewife, except that within the S/M world the slave's position is more likely to be fully consensual, especially of the slave is male. Within the S/M world, a full time "slave" arrangement is entered into with an explicit awareness of the magnitude carefully, with more awareness of the magnitude of power that is being given up, and hence is usually entered into much more carefully, with more awareness of the possible dangers, and with much clearer and more specific agreements than usually precede the traditional marriage.
9. CONSENSUAL TOTAL SLAVE WITH NO LIMITS. A common fantasy ideal which probably doesn't exist in real life (except in authoritarian religious cults and other situations where the "consent" is induced by brainwashing and/or social or economic pressures, and hence isn't fully consensual). A few S/M purists will insist that you aren't really a slave unless you're willing to do absolutely anything for your Dom(me), with no limits at all. I've met a few people who claimed to be no-limit slaves, but in all cases I have reason to doubt the claim."
***********************************************************************************
I found this piece on http://www.mybdsm.com/. They claim to be uncertain of the author, so if anyone knows who penned this, let me know and I will give credit where it is due.
Monday, April 5, 2010
Wanted: Female Submissive
Ok, this is officially a job ad. I am looking for a female submissive who would like to work with Me on a casual basis doing sessions that would involve Me, you, and select submissive male clients.
You MUST:
- be between the ages of 18 and 30.
- be healthy, in good physical condition, and must possess self-esteem and self-respect.
- be at minimum a high school graduate, but higher education preferred (university student ideal).
- be living in, or within 20 minutes of the downtown Toronto area (west end ideal).
- be reliable, flexible, and punctual.
- be a grounded person with a good sense of humour.
- genuinely enjoy experiencing submission in a BDSM encounter (your limits will always be respected).
If you are out there and interested, send an email to the_alchemical_seductress@inbox.com telling Me a bit about yourself and why you'd like this opportunity. If I decide that you may be suitable, you must be willing to meet me for an in-person interview over coffee within a week of My getting back to you.
Thanks in advance!
You MUST:
- be between the ages of 18 and 30.
- be healthy, in good physical condition, and must possess self-esteem and self-respect.
- be at minimum a high school graduate, but higher education preferred (university student ideal).
- be living in, or within 20 minutes of the downtown Toronto area (west end ideal).
- be reliable, flexible, and punctual.
- be a grounded person with a good sense of humour.
- genuinely enjoy experiencing submission in a BDSM encounter (your limits will always be respected).
If you are out there and interested, send an email to the_alchemical_seductress@inbox.com telling Me a bit about yourself and why you'd like this opportunity. If I decide that you may be suitable, you must be willing to meet me for an in-person interview over coffee within a week of My getting back to you.
Thanks in advance!
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