Employee Memo

I have recently been promoted to Directing Manager of Santa's Naughty List.
In my new role here at North Pole Inc., will be in charge of making a list, and checking it twice so that I can find out who has been naughty and who has been nice.
Then, I will be determining where the naughty boys and girls live (thank heavens for Google Earth) so that I can slide down their chimneys on Christmas Eve (facilitated by rubbing lubrication all over my red and white latex catsuit uniform).
Once inside each house, I will kidnap each individual according to Santa's New Protocol (i.e. by gagging them with a candycane, tying them up with strings of LED christmas lights, and throwing them in a potato sack.)
Please note that all of these "naughties" will then be transported to my playspace where I will strip them naked and use them as interactive holiday decorations until they promise to be nicer next year.

I am around for the holidays and can think of 101 perverted things to do with christmas pudding. Consider yourself warned.